Health scare

Hi everyone. I don't like expressing my feelings. I don't like feeling weak. And I'm an ICU nurse so i really do not like NOT having control over a medical situation. I'm a difficult person if you haven't gathered that. But my husband just had an ultrasound and there is a nodule on his thyroid. He's the best person you can imagine, he is an ally and an amazingly strong person.  This is his first health scare and I feel paralyzed.  He's my best friend and partner in life. I'm so scared. What can I do? 

Comments

  • I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. It’s probably the worst, most helpless feeling imaginable. The advice that was given to me during a similar time of need was trust in your doctors. But I wanna say this: trust your gut too. If you’re hearing something that doesn’t sound right or sit well, get a second opinion, push back. Don’t worry about being annoying or a nag— this is your spouse.

    These days, things that would be grim back in the day are now treated more efficiently and effectively. Be there for your husband and let him know it’s ok to lean on you. When my wife was going through her health scare I needed to lean on her because I was scared and she said it helped her through the process because she knew I cared so much. So I think it would be ok to lean on him too. If there’s anything I can do, please let me know, but it’s really easy to think the worst when you hear this news initially, but it’s important to take it day by day and staying positive.
    DeeMichelleJennyNoelMurderbear
  • Jenny said:
    Hi everyone. I don't like expressing my feelings. I don't like feeling weak. And I'm an ICU nurse so i really do not like NOT having control over a medical situation. I'm a difficult person if you haven't gathered that. But my husband just had an ultrasound and there is a nodule on his thyroid. He's the best person you can imagine, he is an ally and an amazingly strong person.  This is his first health scare and I feel paralyzed.  He's my best friend and partner in life. I'm so scared. What can I do? 
    A few years ago a large (1 inch wide, 2 inches long) tumour was discovered on my thyroid.  It turned out to not be cancerous but I did have to have it removed (I lost 1/2 of my thyroid as a result). There was a period between when I got a biopsy and when the results came back where I was bracing myself for the distinct possibility that it was cancerous.  My family doctor, endocrinologist, and surgical counselor all loaded me up with pamphlets and literature regarding thyroid cancer and I read it all.

    Obviously, I'm not a doctor and I don't know anything about your husband's situation.  I can share with you what I learned from my experience though.  The survival rate for thyroid cancer is extremely high, something like 96% (in Canada, I doubt America is much different).  If he has to have 1/2 of his thyroid removed his life will go on as normal, there are no side effects.  If he has to have his entire thyroid removed he'll have to take a medication called synthroid that will essentially do for his body what his thyroid is currently doing (I don't know how much this might cost, in Canada it would be free).

    I know how scary this is and what you're going through, I went through it myself.  I found a lot of peace of mind in the medical literature, reading it helped me a lot.

    I know this is easier said than done, but stay strong.  If he's like most husbands, he'll worry more about you (and the kids?) than he will about himself.  Doing your best to keep yourself calm and supportive will probably help him more than anything else will.

    If you want to PM me for a less public conversation, please feel free.  If your husband wants someone to talk to I'd be open to that as well.
    gguenotDeeMichelleJennyA_Ron_HubbardNoelMurderbear
  • ChinaskiChinaski Santa Cruz, CA
    dang, that must be so scary. hang in there Jenny. be strong and stay positive (i know easier said than done). sending thoughts, prayers, and positive vibes to you and your husbands way.
    gguenotMichelleJennyCretanBull
  • DeeDee Adelaide
    I can only echo was @gguenot said - trust your doctors but trust your gut and don’t let anyone railroad you. And take comfort in the numbers @CretanBull has given. 

    ❤️
    gguenotMichelleJennyMurderbearCretanBull
  • A_Ron_HubbardA_Ron_Hubbard Cincinnati, OH
    Damn, @gguenot, what a hero. That's a quality post.

    I had a lump scare in my early 30s too, and it turned to be benign. But there is so much anxiety between discovery and testing and results. I wish I was the kind of person to not worry about things until you know enough to be worried about, but pssssh, that's amateur hour bullshit. I'm a professional worrier.

    Having said that, it's still the best policy to try to put the worry aside as best as you can. If you find yourself spiraling, take some deep breaths and focus on your body's response to the stress, and try to relax it part by part and system by system. Don't worry if it doesn't start to work right away, or you manage to calm yourself before a new wave of anxiety hits. The point is you're distracting your mind and body with the process itself, and it tends to work, and gets better over time with practice.

    Hoping you guys get good news real soon!
    gguenotDeeMichelleJenny
  • MichelleMichelle California
    @Jenny, we're all thinking of you and your husband and sending love. :heart:
    Jenny
  • Thank you all for you kind thoughts and for being so open and generous with sharing your experiences.  It truly helped in dispelling much of the anxiety surrounding this scare, and I am so grateful to you❤.

    We got good news! It turns out it is a benign cyst and he just needs to follow up in a year with another ultrasound. It is still large enough for him to feel it when he swallows so we have to monitor that but at least cancer is off the table. 
    It is so hard not to get caught up in the hectic day to day life, work, bills,  kid in virtual school, pandemic, the absolute absurdity and terror of life in America right now etc. Sometimes we get a swift kick in the ass to remind us of how it really comes down to the people you love surrounding you, and silver lining to this experience is that I won't try to take any of it for granted. We're both 36 now and that immortality of youth veil is slowly being lifted so it's more important than ever to re-learn that lesson.
    Again, thank you all for sharing a piece of your lives with me. I'm so grateful to be a part of the supportive baldmove community ❤❤❤❤
    cdriveChinaskiMichelleCretanBullgguenotDeeNoelA_Ron_HubbardEine FrauJoshTheBlackand 2 others.
  • cdrivecdrive Houston, TX
    Yes! Benign. So happy for you guys.  
    Jenny
  • cdrive said:
    Yes! Benign. So happy for you guys.  
    So I’m an idiot and always get confused between benign and malignant. So much so that my wife recently had a small mole on her leg removed and she showed me the email results saying “benign” and I just burst into tears and cried out “No!” because I thought it was the bad news one. Lot going on emotionally for me lately if you couldn’t tell lol. 

    Very happy for you @Jenny ! Definitely cause for cracking open an nice bottle to celebrate!
    A_Ron_HubbardJenny
  • DeeDee Adelaide
    What a relief for you both - that’s fantastic news. ❤️
    Jenny
  • A_Ron_HubbardA_Ron_Hubbard Cincinnati, OH
    gguenot said:
    cdrive said:
    Yes! Benign. So happy for you guys.  
    So I’m an idiot and always get confused between benign and malignant. So much so that my wife recently had a small mole on her leg removed and she showed me the email results saying “benign” and I just burst into tears and cried out “No!” because I thought it was the bad news one. Lot going on emotionally for me lately if you couldn’t tell lol. 

    Very happy for you @Jenny ! Definitely cause for cracking open an nice bottle to celebrate!

    That's incredibly sweet. I personally like to pronounce it "ben-IG-in" just for funsies.
    Jenny
  • gguenot said:
    cdrive said:
    Yes! Benign. So happy for you guys.  
    So I’m an idiot and always get confused between benign and malignant. So much so that my wife recently had a small mole on her leg removed and she showed me the email results saying “benign” and I just burst into tears and cried out “No!” because I thought it was the bad news one. Lot going on emotionally for me lately if you couldn’t tell lol. 

    Very happy for you @Jenny ! Definitely cause for cracking open an nice bottle to celebrate!

    That's incredibly sweet. I personally like to pronounce it "ben-IG-in" just for funsies.

    Sure. For fun. That's why you pronounce it like that. :)
    Giovanni
  • Very happy to hear it's benign @Jenny
    Jenny
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