I was texting with my buddy whose big into aliens about the UAP report released and I told him we’ll be in Roswell next month coming back from a road trip. He says “NM in July? Going to throw a pizza on Mr. White’s roof?” Haha I thought. “That’s a great idea!” Then he shows me a picture of the current owners:
That gate is so “Tell me you’re tired of pizzas getting thrown on your roof with not actually telling me you’re tired of pizzas getting thrown on your roof.”
Can you imagine just kicking back watching tv and you hear a faint ‘thump’ on your roof every once in a while? Even more meta if you’re watching Breaking Bad at the time.
i'd be more annoyed with the fact that food was being wasted as that's one of my pet peeves. just knock on my door and give me the free pizza. maybe i'll invite you in for a slice or 2.
people watching at the airport today on my way home as a reminder of how awful people can be. anyways, i saw a lousy entitled kid (well like 16-20 years old) throw a fit (no idea why, i was just sitting back, listening to music and enjoying the show) to a gate agent (she wasnt haven't it which was great). here's the kick.. he sat down down all huffing and puffing with a subway bag, pulled out a bag of dorritos, and opened the f'n bag upside down!! that's where i draw the line! i almost got up to shake em and ask what his deal was. so yeah, that was my day.. home now and looking forward to sleeping in my own bed despite no longer being in Hawaii.
I don't know if this story will translate well because the crux of it relies on something that I said and precisely how I said it, but it's too funny to at least not try to share.
I had to help my elderly aunt with some banking. The full story is too long, but the short version is that an elderly friend - Norman - sent my aunt a cheque and she had to endorse the cheque to me so that I could deposit it into my account and then send an eTransfer to another lady named Gene. This lady had been due this money for a while and was impatiently waiting for it.
Norman is a really nice guy, but he's very Christian and the super prim and proper type - just being in his presence forces you to be on your best behaviour and to be very careful with things you say around him because any topic or words that are even remotely improper will result in a scolding from him (honestly though, he's a really good guy - just old fashioned).
My aunt received the cheque on Tuesday, so I called Norman to let him know that we were going to cash the cheque on Wednesday. When Wednesday rolled around, my aunt wasn't feeling well so I had to call Norman and let him know that we wouldn't be able to get to the bank until Thursday. Again, Gene was impatiently waiting for it so I wanted to make sure that Norman knew exactly what was going on.
When I told Norman that I'd take my aunt to the bank on Thursday, he reminded me that it was Canada Day and the bank would be closed. In my head I realized that not getting to the bank until Friday would mean that Gene wouldn't get her money until next Monday because the bank had told us that there would be a 1 business day hold on the cheque. Knowing that Norman was already stressed out because Gene had been after him for this money, my mind started racing as I tried to come up with an idea that would help. When I realized I had nothing, I said "Damn" and immediately reacted to that because I figured that I'd just offended super proper Norman by 'cursing' (in his book, 'damn' is a cuss word!) and I began to say "Geez" but I cut myself off midway through the word thinking that even "Geez" might upset him. The combination of me saying "Damn" quickly followed by "Geez" which I cut off sound like "Damn Ge..z" to which Norman said (and keep in mind, we're talking about money and what I said was my reaction to being told the banks would be closed) "Did you just say damn Jews?"
I was MORTIFIED! I physically felt my skin flush and I'm sure that I turned beet red. I went into a total panic and I was like "NO! NO!.....NO! NO! NO! I'm not an anti-Semite!! That's not what I said! Well, it's what I said but not what I meant!!" I rambled on for probably a minute while having a full-blown meltdown ha!
I was pretty sure that I eventually convinced Norman that I didn't say "damn Jews", but still wasn't entirely sure when I'd gotten off the phone with him. I'm certain that my crazy over-the-top reaction was either what someone falsely accused of being an anti-Semite would say, or - equally - what an actual anti-Semite might say if they accidentally exposed themselves.
So, Friday comes and my aunt and I go to the bank and everything is sorted and we're in a cab on our way home and I'm still wondering if Norman accepted my explanation or not (I was mortified that this guy might think that I was anti-Semitic). So I casually asked my aunt if she'd spoken to Norman and if he happened to mention anything. She hadn't spoken to Norman, but she picked up on my nervousness and wanted to know why I asked if they'd spoken. "Is it about Gene?" she asked. I said "No...it's hard to explain, but if Norman asks you if I hate Jewish people can you please tell him I don't?"
Upon hearing that, the cab driver let out the loudest and heartiest "BAWH HA HA HA!" I've ever heard in my life.
@CretanBull why didn't Norman just send a check to Gene? It could have totally eliminated your need for an anti-Semitic rant.
I know right?! Keep in mind that all of the people involved are elderly (except me, ha!). Gene is on her own and has mobility issues so she needed an eTransfer that would save her a difficult trip to the bank. Norman isn't set up for eBanking and couldn't figure it out, so he sent the cheque to my aunt because he knew that my aunt does eBanking. The problem is that after he put the cheque in the mail, my aunt's computer died and she doesn't know any of her passwords (they're all saved for her in a program that keeps track of them for her) so she couldn't log in from another computer. She took her computer in to be repaired (it needs a new screen) but it won't be ready until some time next week.
The funny thing is all of this is over a piano that no one wants, but no one wants to sell or get rid of either. Norman and Gene were in a community theatre group, they'd both left it years ago but the group came to an end because of Covid. For some reason, Norman didn't want the group to get rid of the piano so he agreed to buy...but he had nowhere to put it so he had it sent to Gene's house. Gene has since sold her house and moved into a retirement home so she had to pay to have the piano moved into a storage locker and that's what this money was for. I should point out that Norman and Gene don't live anywhere near each other. Norman lives in Montreal and Gene lives in a city called Windsor (near Detroit) which is about an 8 or 9 hour drive away.
Eating lunch at Airport Mesa Grill right by the Airport Mesa vortex in Sedona and gahdang do I no shit feel this vortex. Like a tingly uplifting body vibe. Groovy man.
Eating lunch at Airport Mesa Grill right by the Airport Mesa vortex in Sedona and gahdang do I no shit feel this vortex. Like a tingly uplifting body vibe. Groovy man.
That’s roofies. If you wake up in the hotel airport without a kidney I’m sorry…
Eating lunch at Airport Mesa Grill right by the Airport Mesa vortex in Sedona and gahdang do I no shit feel this vortex. Like a tingly uplifting body vibe. Groovy man.
Eating lunch at Airport Mesa Grill right by the Airport Mesa vortex in Sedona and gahdang do I no shit feel this vortex. Like a tingly uplifting body vibe. Groovy man.
Eating lunch at Airport Mesa Grill right by the Airport Mesa vortex in Sedona and gahdang do I no shit feel this vortex. Like a tingly uplifting body vibe. Groovy man.
NBD…just journeyed to THE CENTER OF SPACE AND TIME today! Also, speaking about “out of this world”, The White Sand Dunes at twilight yesterday were wild, man.
@bizmarkiefader Our visa system has some weird “good character” thing attached to it. It’s interesting that her heinous and blatant racism and general job of being a vile media troll wasn’t enough to keep her out of the country, but flouting Covid rules was just too much.
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Phoebe at the end...
im done with subway. Rubber mat bread and non-dna “Tuna”. And upside down dorrito people.
I had to help my elderly aunt with some banking. The full story is too long, but the short version is that an elderly friend - Norman - sent my aunt a cheque and she had to endorse the cheque to me so that I could deposit it into my account and then send an eTransfer to another lady named Gene. This lady had been due this money for a while and was impatiently waiting for it.
Norman is a really nice guy, but he's very Christian and the super prim and proper type - just being in his presence forces you to be on your best behaviour and to be very careful with things you say around him because any topic or words that are even remotely improper will result in a scolding from him (honestly though, he's a really good guy - just old fashioned).
My aunt received the cheque on Tuesday, so I called Norman to let him know that we were going to cash the cheque on Wednesday. When Wednesday rolled around, my aunt wasn't feeling well so I had to call Norman and let him know that we wouldn't be able to get to the bank until Thursday. Again, Gene was impatiently waiting for it so I wanted to make sure that Norman knew exactly what was going on.
When I told Norman that I'd take my aunt to the bank on Thursday, he reminded me that it was Canada Day and the bank would be closed. In my head I realized that not getting to the bank until Friday would mean that Gene wouldn't get her money until next Monday because the bank had told us that there would be a 1 business day hold on the cheque. Knowing that Norman was already stressed out because Gene had been after him for this money, my mind started racing as I tried to come up with an idea that would help. When I realized I had nothing, I said "Damn" and immediately reacted to that because I figured that I'd just offended super proper Norman by 'cursing' (in his book, 'damn' is a cuss word!) and I began to say "Geez" but I cut myself off midway through the word thinking that even "Geez" might upset him. The combination of me saying "Damn" quickly followed by "Geez" which I cut off sound like "Damn Ge..z" to which Norman said (and keep in mind, we're talking about money and what I said was my reaction to being told the banks would be closed) "Did you just say damn Jews?"
I was MORTIFIED! I physically felt my skin flush and I'm sure that I turned beet red. I went into a total panic and I was like "NO! NO!.....NO! NO! NO! I'm not an anti-Semite!! That's not what I said! Well, it's what I said but not what I meant!!" I rambled on for probably a minute while having a full-blown meltdown ha!
I was pretty sure that I eventually convinced Norman that I didn't say "damn Jews", but still wasn't entirely sure when I'd gotten off the phone with him. I'm certain that my crazy over-the-top reaction was either what someone falsely accused of being an anti-Semite would say, or - equally - what an actual anti-Semite might say if they accidentally exposed themselves.
So, Friday comes and my aunt and I go to the bank and everything is sorted and we're in a cab on our way home and I'm still wondering if Norman accepted my explanation or not (I was mortified that this guy might think that I was anti-Semitic). So I casually asked my aunt if she'd spoken to Norman and if he happened to mention anything. She hadn't spoken to Norman, but she picked up on my nervousness and wanted to know why I asked if they'd spoken. "Is it about Gene?" she asked. I said "No...it's hard to explain, but if Norman asks you if I hate Jewish people can you please tell him I don't?"
Upon hearing that, the cab driver let out the loudest and heartiest "BAWH HA HA HA!" I've ever heard in my life.
So, that was my week in a nutshell.
The funny thing is all of this is over a piano that no one wants, but no one wants to sell or get rid of either. Norman and Gene were in a community theatre group, they'd both left it years ago but the group came to an end because of Covid. For some reason, Norman didn't want the group to get rid of the piano so he agreed to buy...but he had nowhere to put it so he had it sent to Gene's house. Gene has since sold her house and moved into a retirement home so she had to pay to have the piano moved into a storage locker and that's what this money was for. I should point out that Norman and Gene don't live anywhere near each other. Norman lives in Montreal and Gene lives in a city called Windsor (near Detroit) which is about an 8 or 9 hour drive away.