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  • interviewing and Job hunting advice

    Hatorian said:

    Tip: never be honest about your previous salary, what you make plus 25% so you actually get a raise when switching jobs. 
    I think this is good advice if the company is going to potentially base their offer on your current salary. Of course, this could all be avoidable if companies would just be transparent in at least giving out a ballpark of what they are willing to pay for the right candidates, instead of putting it all on the candidate to pull a number out of the air. People looking for jobs have enough worry about without needing to worry about potentially pricing themselves out of a job or saying that they would work for far less than what the company would normally be willing to pay (then finding out later their co-workers make 10-15k per year more than them for the same position and qualifications).

    This is especially true in my case from my last transition of employment. I worked for a software company who was closing down our location They gave me an option to relocate or work there for the next 10 months and also get severance + a retention bonus if I stayed until the end of July 2018 (at which point I would be let go). Of course, I wasn't going to count on severance if I found a good job in the meantime. So I went on around 15 or so interviews over around a 4 month period.
    During the interview process, the company who hired me asked me how much I currently make. Now, this company also knows that my reason for wanting to leave the company I was currently employed by was due to them closing down our location, so I wasn't unemployed but I also wasn't holding all of the bargaining chips that a happily employed applicant normally has.
    I researched the position and around how much others had reported being paid at that company using websites such as Glassdoor and Salary . com. When they asked me how much I was currently earning, I told them it was around 10k more than my actual salary. 

    I'm glad I did, because when they offered me, they literally offered me the exact same amount as what I reported I was currently earning, plus .16 cents.

    So, if I had not embellished my salary, one could conclude that it likely would have cost me 10k per year. I have a wife and a 4 year old girl. They appreciated the lie.
    I agree that can work. But I can also tell you that my last interview when we got to salary negotiation they wanted a pay slip. Now if I lied before this I probably don’t get the job. But if I was honest and told them my expectation was a 10-15% increase or your industry pays more so my salary expectation is higher is a much safer play. In my specific example I was honest and showed them a pay slip but told them I wanted more. But I was also in a better position where it was clear they saw my value and wanted me and knew I wasn’t going to switch jobs without better compensation. 

    I Guess it all comes down to how you want to play it. There’s nothing wrong with your method per se. And they maybe just believe you and make an offer. But if you get put into a prove it situation and you can’t back it up then I really don’t see how they offer the job when one of your first initial interactions with a new employer is lying to them. 

    It really comes down to risk or risk mitigation. You can risk it with your play or your can mitigate the risk by playing it safe but setting a higher salary expectation. 
    I'm going to agree with Hatorian here. Any time you lie about something you're taking a risk that someone might find out you've been dishonest. When they ask you, "How much are you making?", why not just say, "I'm looking for something in the XX-XXk range." 

    Obviously you can sidestep the question about your current salary, and if someone really presses (which is rare), you can always just be honest and say, "I'm making XXk, but I'm underpaid in my current position because [insert reason]. I'm looking for something that brings me more in line with my skills and experience, which is [whatever raise you want]." You could also refer to your total compensation rather than salary, which would include things like 401k matching, and included healthcare benefits, etc. If your salary is 50k, but you get a 5% match, and free healthcare, your total compensation might be 60k. 

     It's a negotiation and giving away your current salary is giving away some leverage, especially if you're looking for a big raise. That's why some states have passed laws to stop employers from asking for your current salary. 

    I'd rather be honest and just tell them what amount of money I want to take the job, than actually lie about what you're currently making. It's just not necessary and has a big downside if someone actually asks for proof. 
  • 807 - Time for After

    Michelle said:
    I rarely make memes, but when I do it's a partially naked Rick Grimes.

    Why is Rick's hair always sopping wet? Every scene it looks like he just jumped out of the shower. Why does no one else have a sopping wet mess of hair on their head too? 
  • 704 - "Spoilers (ha) of War"

    Sansa while watching Arya spat with Brienne "what the fuck happened to my siblings?"

    Their reunion seemed pretty good, until after watching Ayra and Breeane duel, you think Sansa would have a better reaction than just turning away and walking off. Maybe a look of surprise or awe, or confusion as to how the heck did my little sister do that?! Instead she seemed annoyed. Maybe, jealousy? Sansa wants to prove her leadership and then here comes her little sister killing it with Breeane.

    Sansa also might have been jealous of Ayra's reunion with Bran. Bran didn't voice some horrible moment from Ayra's past, he also handed her the valarean steel dagger. Speaking of which how was that dagger the thing that started up everything? I'm curious how it got in littlefinger's hands
    It's been awhile, but Joffrey hired the assassin to kill Bran with the dagger (which previously belonged to Littlefinger who lost it in a bet to Robert). After the failed attempt Catelyn had the dagger, which she asked asked Littlefinger about. He knowingly placed the blame on Tyrion, manipulating Catelyn into taking Tyrion hostage, which basically started the war between the Starks and Lannisters. Littlefinger than played both sides until he could determine which side would provide him the most benefit, resulting in his betrayal of Ned and being named Lord of Harrenhal.

    Basically that dagger which belonged to Littlefinger was what caused the entire war. In fact if you could blame one person for everything that happened to house Stark, or the realm in general, you would have to pick Littlefinger. 

    I can't remember where the dagger ends up after Catelyn asks Littlefinger about it, but more than likely she gave it back to him which is why he is in possession of it now. 
    [Deleted User]KingKobracdrive
  • How To Raise a Human

    As others mentioned, don't be afraid to let your baby try everything you eat (of course listen to doctors, no cows milk first year etc...) The time between 4-8(?) months is the time that your baby is really open to trying new foods, after that they get more picky. So give them exposure to all kinds of things once they start eating at the table so that they won't be a picky eater later in life. If they don't like something keep trying the next day, some times it takes many tries before they accept the new food. 

    In regards to the birth, we hired a doula (some of the best money I ever spent!!!!! and it was reimbursable through my health care savings account). When my wife went in to labor, I was pretty scared shitless (I kept my composure, but underneath I was incredibly nervous) and I can't tell you how awesome it was to have the help of an experienced person that had been through it before countless times there to help support my wife and ME throughout the entire birth process. You have to find someone you trust and our comfortable with though, as obviously your experience will differ depending on the person. Meet them in person and interview them before you hire them if this is something you want to do. 

    For hospitals (if you have a choice, otherwise skip this paragraph), we went with a place that did Midwives. We felt we got to spend a lot more time with them than we would have with a doctor. Visit the hospital, almost all of them do tours, and make sure it's some place that you are comfortable with. 

    Finally (whew!) make sure you pick a good childrens doctor/clinic for your baby. I can't tell you how much we love that we can get in usually same day or next day at ours (in case it's somewhat urgent) and how they schedule appointments on Saturdays too.  

    If you're doing daycare let us know and I'd be happy to give you my experience with that too. Any questions about anything above just ask. 

    Last thing, I bought a journal that we started writing in occasionally for our baby. From my wife's pregnancy until now. We let relatives and close friends write something when they visit some times, and I hope one day she'll appreciate the whole process. I know I've gone back and read stuff from a year and a half ago and it was awesome to have that memory recorded. 

    P.S. I'm from New York originally, I'd say make your kid a Yankees fan! It will be better than having to root for the Mets right? I jest. :) Congratulations!
  • How To Raise a Human

    Our first, just turned one last week. So I'll give you my relative tips based on this last year. 

    As mentioned by many others "The Happiest Baby on the Block" is great. You can buy a used DVD off Amazon for like 5 bucks. There is also a book but we didn't read that, and the DVD seemed very sufficient for about 2 hours of visual explanation. The tips are a life saver for the first 0-6 months. 

    The "Expectant Father", and "The New Father" by Armin Brott are both great for a new parent. They are broken into months and really give you a good understanding of all the things that are happening with your baby that month, and things you can do to help them, teach them, etc. If you're not in to reading then you can just read the first few pages every month and be a leg up. 

    I'll second the cloth diaper thing, it saves a lot of money, and isn't nearly as hard as some people would make you believe. However our little one has had a lot of rashes (our daycare won't do cloth diapers) and thus we haven't gotten out as much use out of them as we would have liked. You can't use diaper rash cream with ours, so we've ended up using a lot of disposables too. 

    Breastfeeding - is great, both for your baby and saving you money on formula. There are TONS of support group, help, etc. for new mothers, make sure you know about these resources and be supportive of your wife. It takes a little getting used to, but once my wife got used to it (after maybe a month or two) it became quite natural. If your wife is going to go back to work after some time, make sure she ends up with a good breast pump (don't skimp!), and some are even covered by insurance or you could by used if necessary.

    Open a 529 plan for your baby if you can afford to. We did ours through Vanguard since our state didn't offer any tax savings. Set up automatic contributions. The earlier you start the more you can take advantage of compounding interest. Don't wait like us or it might not get done until your kid's first birthday! I did a lot of research and the 529 plans seemed far better than other type of college saving plan. Of course if you can't financially afford to put money aside right now then don't, it's better to pay off things if you have any debt than save for your kid's education 18 years later. 

    Things to buy: The book/guide "Baby Bargains" is amazing. If you're like me and have to review/research everything this book does an amazing job of putting everything together in one place. You can still do additional research if you want, but the book has been pretty good at giving you a general idea of what brands/products to stay away from and what ones are well regarded. They have a section for everything you could want, from cribs, strollers, car seats, play pens, etc. Make sure you get the latest edition.

    Don't go crazy and buy tons of stuff. Family, friends will probably gift you a ton of cloths and other things. We haven't bought more than a thing or two for clothing for our baby. The bigger things that we did need to buy and are very important:
    1. A good car seat (we like our Chicco)
    2. A good stroller (we've got a baby jogger city mini - it's not a jogging stroller, just a super compact one) with a car sear adapter for the first few months. Go for lots of walks with your baby and let them get some fresh air!
    3. White noise machine if you have an open floor plan or noisy house
    4. Changing station so you don't have to bend over. We bought an ikea dresser (diapers/wipes/etc in the top drawer) and attached a changing pad on top. Our diaper jenie went next to it (these are useful, especially if you're using disposables).
    5. A good diaper bag that both you and your wife feel comfortable carrying. 
    6. Maybe this should be number one, but a good high chair that is easy to clean. We ended up buying a baby bjorne, which is one of our most expensive purchases (even buying an open box deal), but it was super worth it. It's so easy to clean and so compact next to others that we are very happy with it. The other major advantages is the tray sits right next to your baby so the food doesn't fall down and get all over them. CLEANING FOOD EVERYWHERE SUCKS!
    7. A crib that is the right size for your space and has adjustable height levels. Don't 
    get suckered in for the 2k crib and dresser packages unless you've got money to burn.

    Don't be afraid to buy open box or used stuff (the only thing you probably shouldn't buy used is the crib or car seat for safety reasons). We've had to hardly buy any toys or clothes, and got a lot from friends who were just trying to get rid of stuff. 

    (Continued in next post)